pushing for perfection? let us instead let the light in!

We really do push ourselves to far.
I am starting to notice that as women we just push and push and push.

I am around alot of women. Most of my clients are women, I work with mostly all women, and the majority of my family and friends are women. I watch them, listen to them and connect with them, I am really  noticing a trend. As women, we really are our own worst enemy.

We are demanding on our bodies, we are self sacraficing, we do not give enough credit, we push ourselves to our limits and beyond, we simply seem to feel that we are last on the list. We create a mountain of impossible goals to achieve, and usually we fall. We make it impossible to live up the the standards we create for ourselves.

By expecting so much from ourselves, we bring ourselves to a point in which We say,
"OK, I am done. I can't do anymore!"
We are down for the count. We can't bear to carry so much weight anymore.

Many women, my clients and friends are going through some sort of burn out, chronic pain or exhaustion. When I ask them why do they think they got there, they all seem to have the same answers for me. They simply say there was no time or energy to put into focusing on themselves. They kept putting of 'treatment'. There was too much to do in their lives and no one can do it like they can.

I believe that as women we think we are the only ones capable of doing things perfect (this only seems to get worst as we become mothers).

We believe in perfection and strive for it. It almost seems like in most of us we subconsciously believe that perfection does exist and individually we can achieve it. With this, we are setting ourselves up for disaster.

Perfection does not exist.

We believe in the the perfect body, the perfect job, the perfect house, the perfect family, the perfect marriage/relationship, the perfect mother. We are pushing so hard to find them, but unfortunately these are all myths. They do not exist.

So what are we doing when we strive for perfection?
We are creating the inevitable chance of burn out and pain.

We push for perfection, we get discouraged when it does not happen, so we push some more.

But how do we stop this cycle? How do we accept a lack of perfection?

I think we just need to listen to the smartest person we know, you. Our own being knows exactly what we need to achieve a fulfilled life. We just need to reconnect with it.

I truly believe that as women we need to just listen more. Listen to our bodies, our hearts and our minds. Rather then just pushing through it all to achieve that elusive sense of perfection.

We need to connect.
When we are in pain, listen to the body. Why are we in pain? Work within the bodies limits. Pushing through only creates more pain and disappointment in the end.
When we are sick, listen. Let yourself be sick and heal. Do not push. Let go of your guilt and just listen to yourself.
When we are feeling down, take a moment. Listen to our mind and spirit. Why are you sad, lonely or scared? Don't tell yourself you have no right to feel like this, because you do. You have every right to feel sad or scared or lonely, just as you have every right to feel joy and happiness. Your feeling are yours alone and you never should feel the need to justify them.

We need to remember, we are all in similar situations. We seem to believe that it is easier to portray this facade of perfection rather then working with the people in your life.

Your life is yours. No justifying that to anyone, just let yourself reach out and let others aid you in your won personal journey.

Let go of guilt, resentment, frustration and exhaustion.

Live your life they way you were meant to, not by pushing but by listen to the most important person, You.

Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering.
There is a crack in everything,
That's how the light gets in.
~Leonard Cohen

I wish you all a marvelous day, let your light in!

Much Love,

Jessica