Hear me!

Last night I attending a workshop put on by the 'early years center/CROW'.

I was called 'How to talk to your kids so they will listen'.

I was very eye opening!

We did this exercise where we had to imagine ourselves in a frustrating and stressful situation and then listen to multiple responses when we tried to talk about/explain our day.

During this exercise I realized that I get very angry and upset when someone tries to tell me how to fix my problem or asks to many questions. 

Also I seem doubt and belittle myself when it is obvious that I am not believed or if someone takes the other person side over mine. 

Why would I expect my children to feel any different?

If Chloe comes to me crying saying

"Mommy, Cinderella broken!"

And I respond with

"Well I told you not to play so rough with it!"

Or if Charlotte is crying because

I am putting blame on her. 

I haven't even acknowledge her sadness. 

Of course she is going to cry louder or throw a fit. 

She feels like no one cares.

 She feels like no one heard her. 

I know how I feel when I am trying to opening up and whoever I am talking to doesn't seem to hear me. 

I feel upset. 

My confidence is swayed. 

I feel angry. 

I feel sad. 

 

Simply put, I feel disrespected and close down the lines of communication (or if it is Court that is not listening to me, I yell at him. I know it sounds dysfunctional, but hey at least I am being honest.)

Why did it take attending a workshop and two years to finally connect the dots that kids are people too?

I mean I know they are 'people' but why did it take me so long to realize that they want the same things you or I want out of relationships.

Mostly they just want to be heard.

An open ear is the only believable sign to an open heart

-David Augsburg

Much love, 

 Jessica